Warning Signs of an Abusive Man

 

There are many sure tell signs of an abuser.  Read the “red flags” below to be able to tell if you are in a relationship with an abuser.

Jealousy –

  • Does not want you to go out with friends or family
  • Does not like when you talk to other men, accuses you of cheating
  • Gets angry when talking to other too often
  • Is very possess of you, always asks where you’ve been
  • Tries to isolate you

Controlling –

  • Demands attention from you
  • Tries to take over your finances and possessions, ie car
  • Gets angry if you show independence
  • Needs to know your schedule constantly

Manipulates –

  • Tries to make you believe that you are crazy
  • Tries to make you think he is not abusive
  • Makes it seem like you are at fault for any trouble
  • Gives excuses for why he’s abusive

Punishes you –

  • Withholds things that you want
  • Does not want to talk about the relationship because you do
  • Criticizes you frequently

Doesn’t act the way he talks –

  • His actions are opposite of what he says
  • He breaks promises
  • Creates a cycle of abuse (fights, hurts you, makes up, repeat)

Superiority –

  • Feels that he is better than anyone
  • Feels above the law
  • He is always right
  • Has to feel powerful and in charge

Mood Swings –

  • Constantly caught off guard by his mood
  • Is happy, in love one moment, then turns abusive and mean

Won’t seek help –

  • Does not believe anything is wrong with him
  • Blames his past

Disrespectful of women –

  • Does not have respect for his mother, sister or any other women in his life
  • Thinks men are superior
  • Thinks women should stay “in their place”

History of abuse –

  • Was abused as a child
  • Has had abusive relationships in the past
  • Abuses animals

If you see any of these signs of abuse, run.  Any one of them can be a red flag and can escalate to another.  It’s only a matter of time until you look back and see all of the red flags.  If you are staying, thinking he can change, think again.  These men say they will change, but before you know it, you are under his power again and the cycle of abuse begins.

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